My perception

bro is home!

here's one piece of advice he gave me. he always acted like he is the oldest and i just let him be.

'i know that you are having hard time hanging around them. but could you please learn to not display it out so obviously? like, come on. just dont show it out.'

that was after our visit to grandma's place. actually i have nothing whatsoever against the others, except one aunt. something happened 2 years ago and i dont think she deserves any respect from me. and most of the time the questions she throws are mockery and rhetorical, i just faintly smile and kept quite.

im afraid i might be too blunt if i were to answer and mom will slash me alive afterwards. so, i kinda ignore her.

i wonder if friends, your big family member are the same? they are loud and talks at the same time. i was dizzy sitting in the living room yesterday because everybody was trying to be on top of each other's voice. who's listening if everybody just want to talk.

my aunt mocked me after grandma said that im the quite and feminine one. she loudly said, 'dont you worry, that runs in our big family, the quite genes, like, my daughter! you! ...and, who else??'

=,=

okay, so i learn not to be so serious and have to learn to control facial expression.

good news is, my brain kinda install a blocking system when i try to access data about him. i just stop myself from doing so. thanks Lord. thank you.